Tuesday, April 26, 2005
Leaving the United States of Mind Part II
Took a train to Luxembourg that night, which was probably not the best call ever. We a arrived in L'burg and went straight to a map to find our hotel's street. Sex shop ads all around the map, so we knew we were in a classy place. The hotel was 5 mins from the station and was surrounded by either sex or booze shops. Augusine being the hard ass, walks straight into the sex shop next to our hotel. We walk down a flight of stairs and walk into what is basically a small strip club with no strippers in sight--only two fully dressed women at the end of the bar. After we order our drinks, they immediately come over. I had a Spanish girl who had her thigh between my legs before she said a word. (Un)fortunately she didn't speak a lick of English so all I had to do was nod or shake my head, based on her inflection. Finally she realized I couldn't make small talk, so she kinda moved toward my uh.....self but I was quick to turn her down. After Augustine found out how much a bottle of champagne cost (I think it was about 100 Euro), we left. Sorry guys, no all night brothel stories just yet. Went to a semi-regular bar and got drunk and walked around the block once. The people on the street reminded me of the kind of people you would meet at 4 am after a Widespread show. Custie as fuck.
We wake up and one of us asks the receptionist if 'there is anything cool to do in Luxembourg', to which the receptionist gave us an evil look and handed us a tourist map. Walked around and ate fast food like the tourists we are. WHile looking at a memorial for all those brave Luxembourgians that died in battle the fast food hit me like a bowling ball through kleenex.. I had to scurry my clenched ass to a pay toile which was, of course, occupado. After trying a couple of places with no success, mostly because of the language barrier, I finally snuck into a nice restaurant and bolted for the toilette. When I got back the boys were trying to figure out where the police stations and hospitals were. Thankful I had returned unharmed and unsoiled, we wander a little more before our train leaves for Basel.
The trip through the southeast border of France was just gorgeous. Little villages dotting the hillside. When got off the train in Basel, we step outside for a cigarette and see this weird little sight: commerce and transportation happening with no horns or bells, no yelling or screeching of tires. Just many people coming and going peacefully. Not bizarre so much as off kilter. Felt like it was how things should work. Off to Interlacken.
We get off the train and ask the nearest cabbie where Hotel Mattenhof is and he actually points us in the right direction without selling his service AT ALL! We stumble across the whole city, luggage in tow and come upon a woman (that could have been any of our mothers) walking a dog at 11.30 at night. "Mattenhof?" "Ah yes, zat vay" with a smile. We get to the hotel and pass it looking for the hostel, Funny Farm. We ask a guy who had just parked his car, "Funny Farm?" "You're here, man! Welcome!" We walk inside to see people gathered around a bar and two enormous dogs (one being the famed St. Bernard) chilling on the floor. "Hello boys!" says the manager. His name is Tito, late 20s with shoulder length curly black hair. "Velcome to the Funny Farm!" hard to tell whether it was "I'm excited to see you" or "I can't wait to steal you wallet". Alas no wallet stolen, so there is hope for humanity after all.
Anyways, we fwet our room and are out on the balcony when we notice that what we thought were clouds was actually snow on the mountain! It completely blew my perspective on on the mountain from a rolling hill miles away to a towering giant right on top of us. I just giggled and laughed and ran around excited for a good ten minutes. We go down to the bar and meet some other travellers and fulltime ex-pats which is really interesting because the expats seem to be pretty pissed off at the way things are going, while the travellers are not even talking about it. I'm not sure which category I fall into. One expat in particular is Mark, a half-Swiss in his late thirties and a complete boozehound. One of those guys who gets completely drunk and gets up real close to your ear and talks to you like youre 50m away and deaf. Then argues to the death that he's not drunk and the world is coming to an end, so fuck it and move to Switzerland. Nihilism ahoy.
Interlacken is like stepping into a dream where everyone is nice and shit turns into flowers the moment it hits the ground. Blossoms everywhere, Fantastique. We hike up a little hill and get a good view of the city and one of the most startling things about it is the river. Apparently it is created by glacier water. Completely clear on shore, the most beautiful blue in the middle. Me, I don't buy it. They've got to have enslaved more than a thousand gnomes to keep the water blue and the city clean. There's some underground slave cave with little gnomes suffering miserably so that all the Swiss can have clean water and flowers. One day I will expose the truth.
We wake up and one of us asks the receptionist if 'there is anything cool to do in Luxembourg', to which the receptionist gave us an evil look and handed us a tourist map. Walked around and ate fast food like the tourists we are. WHile looking at a memorial for all those brave Luxembourgians that died in battle the fast food hit me like a bowling ball through kleenex.. I had to scurry my clenched ass to a pay toile which was, of course, occupado. After trying a couple of places with no success, mostly because of the language barrier, I finally snuck into a nice restaurant and bolted for the toilette. When I got back the boys were trying to figure out where the police stations and hospitals were. Thankful I had returned unharmed and unsoiled, we wander a little more before our train leaves for Basel.
The trip through the southeast border of France was just gorgeous. Little villages dotting the hillside. When got off the train in Basel, we step outside for a cigarette and see this weird little sight: commerce and transportation happening with no horns or bells, no yelling or screeching of tires. Just many people coming and going peacefully. Not bizarre so much as off kilter. Felt like it was how things should work. Off to Interlacken.
We get off the train and ask the nearest cabbie where Hotel Mattenhof is and he actually points us in the right direction without selling his service AT ALL! We stumble across the whole city, luggage in tow and come upon a woman (that could have been any of our mothers) walking a dog at 11.30 at night. "Mattenhof?" "Ah yes, zat vay" with a smile. We get to the hotel and pass it looking for the hostel, Funny Farm. We ask a guy who had just parked his car, "Funny Farm?" "You're here, man! Welcome!" We walk inside to see people gathered around a bar and two enormous dogs (one being the famed St. Bernard) chilling on the floor. "Hello boys!" says the manager. His name is Tito, late 20s with shoulder length curly black hair. "Velcome to the Funny Farm!" hard to tell whether it was "I'm excited to see you" or "I can't wait to steal you wallet". Alas no wallet stolen, so there is hope for humanity after all.
Anyways, we fwet our room and are out on the balcony when we notice that what we thought were clouds was actually snow on the mountain! It completely blew my perspective on on the mountain from a rolling hill miles away to a towering giant right on top of us. I just giggled and laughed and ran around excited for a good ten minutes. We go down to the bar and meet some other travellers and fulltime ex-pats which is really interesting because the expats seem to be pretty pissed off at the way things are going, while the travellers are not even talking about it. I'm not sure which category I fall into. One expat in particular is Mark, a half-Swiss in his late thirties and a complete boozehound. One of those guys who gets completely drunk and gets up real close to your ear and talks to you like youre 50m away and deaf. Then argues to the death that he's not drunk and the world is coming to an end, so fuck it and move to Switzerland. Nihilism ahoy.
Interlacken is like stepping into a dream where everyone is nice and shit turns into flowers the moment it hits the ground. Blossoms everywhere, Fantastique. We hike up a little hill and get a good view of the city and one of the most startling things about it is the river. Apparently it is created by glacier water. Completely clear on shore, the most beautiful blue in the middle. Me, I don't buy it. They've got to have enslaved more than a thousand gnomes to keep the water blue and the city clean. There's some underground slave cave with little gnomes suffering miserably so that all the Swiss can have clean water and flowers. One day I will expose the truth.
Leaving the United States of Mind- Part I
After partying till the break-a break-a dawn with Petri I had a great last night in town from everyone at the Hill. I got up and met with Borbridge, who calmed my nerves and help me distract myself from the fact that I was leaving everything I had ever known. Went to New Orleans with the rents and had a nice relaxing night around the hotel. (Although Burbach's 23rd was in the back of my mind!) A quick goodbye at the airport. Mom wouldve hugged me and cried for hours if I let her. Off to Dallas. The flight to Dallas was pretty uneventful. The Dallas-Chicago flight was great. There was nobody on this huge 777, so I had all the space in the world. Each seat had a tv screen and there were like 5 movies, a number of tv channels and a flight tracker-which is the shit. The flight tracker shows you your speed, altitude, position on a map, local historic sites that you fly over, current time and temp (-86 F)! Anyways, sat back and watched Cheap Seats Roller Derby and Meet the Fockers. When I got to O'Hare I called as many people as I could in th 45min layover, before my phone hit complete radio silence for a year. I got a hold of a little more than half the people I called. I was in line to board, but got out to give Danny one more shot. Never heard from him. Good luck pahdnuh. Anyways, my seat was 40A, the very last seat on the plane. It was a full plane, but no one had sat down next to me. Then at the last minute a beautiful blone haired blue-eyed girl comes running on the plane. I tense up like a uh...like I always do and of course I'm reading A Clockwork Orange, a great conversation starter. Nice pick, Matt. After about 30 mins of awkward silence I finally say hello. Her name is Dell and she is from Kansas, but lives in Kansas City. A bright, intelligent girl. Graduated from a small liberal arts college in 04 with a degree in English. Tutors full time in a Title I school in K.C. Has played piano since she was 5 and is visiting a friend who is teaching English in Lille, France. Loves the Tulips of Amsterdam. Great conversation.
My first airline meal wasn't horrible but it wasn't great either. Beef tips and mashed potatoes. The sunset was great. I'm not sure exactly where we were (the Chicago-Brussels flight had no tracker) but there was endless lakes below the clouds and I realized that it was the first time in my life that I saw so much land with no human interferance. Kinda blew me away. I get maybe two hours of sleep and wake up and watch a little of The Incredibles but its dubbed in two languages so it was pretty hard to follow. Once we deplane, Dell and I walk to the baggage claim. I find my luggage pretty quickly, but Dell had no such luck. Bags never made it past Chicago, so she's SOL for a couple of days. We take a train into the city and part ways. Thanks, Dell for making my nerve-racking pulling of the trigger a little less hairy.
I walked outside and said "Grand Place" and was pointed in the right direction. Going by the vague directions from the hotel's website, the hotel is in the 'immediate area' of Grand Place. Fuck no. Its like 500 meters away. I walk around Grand Place with its 500 yr-old brickes clickety-clacking under my monster of monster of a material container. After about a half hour, I broke down an bought a map, but with no success. Finally a deli woman took pity on me and gave me great directions. I wasn't even close. Walking back through the square, I was schoolchildren in their little shorts and long socks chanting and singingin Flemish. What a strange and marvelous sight! Exactly how I had pictured it. Visited the Cathedral of Sant Michel du something or other. Built in the early 1200's. Absolutely gorgeous. There was a display of Christian artwork that seemed like canvas, but was actually panes of wood that we carved out and then painted. very cool. After a phatty nap, went to the metro to look for Augustine, but no luck. Went to a pub and ordered Stella Artois and sat down. The barkeep was a burly lumberjackish Frenchman who was very congenial and actually fit the place quite well. The radio played S&G's 'Mrs. Robinson' and the Beatles' 'Across the Universe'. Made me feel like I was a little closer to my own universe. Finally ran into Augustine and his buddy Andy and went back to the same pub to have a couple more night caps. Great to see Augustine. So much fun to hang out with again.
After waking up 20 mins after checkout we hit the tourist spots up: the Cathedral, Grand Place, Mannekin-Pis--which is this little 2 ft statue of a boy pissing. People flock around this fucker like its Da Vinci's Last Supper or something. Anyways we walk around aimlessly for a while and find this outdoor shopping mall, so we stroll down it and I turn around at one point for no particular reason and there was this ancient church sandwiched between a boutique and a gyro shop. I rushed in, Andy and Augustine were a little more hesitant, but they soon succumbed. What a SIGHT! An all white church! There were ornate art pieces and sculptures everywhere. The pews were just simple chairs and it truly felt like solace away from the storm. I sat there for a good ten minutes and became completely relaxed. I walked back into the world cleansed and refreshed and much cleaner than those at the gyro stand.
My first airline meal wasn't horrible but it wasn't great either. Beef tips and mashed potatoes. The sunset was great. I'm not sure exactly where we were (the Chicago-Brussels flight had no tracker) but there was endless lakes below the clouds and I realized that it was the first time in my life that I saw so much land with no human interferance. Kinda blew me away. I get maybe two hours of sleep and wake up and watch a little of The Incredibles but its dubbed in two languages so it was pretty hard to follow. Once we deplane, Dell and I walk to the baggage claim. I find my luggage pretty quickly, but Dell had no such luck. Bags never made it past Chicago, so she's SOL for a couple of days. We take a train into the city and part ways. Thanks, Dell for making my nerve-racking pulling of the trigger a little less hairy.
I walked outside and said "Grand Place" and was pointed in the right direction. Going by the vague directions from the hotel's website, the hotel is in the 'immediate area' of Grand Place. Fuck no. Its like 500 meters away. I walk around Grand Place with its 500 yr-old brickes clickety-clacking under my monster of monster of a material container. After about a half hour, I broke down an bought a map, but with no success. Finally a deli woman took pity on me and gave me great directions. I wasn't even close. Walking back through the square, I was schoolchildren in their little shorts and long socks chanting and singingin Flemish. What a strange and marvelous sight! Exactly how I had pictured it. Visited the Cathedral of Sant Michel du something or other. Built in the early 1200's. Absolutely gorgeous. There was a display of Christian artwork that seemed like canvas, but was actually panes of wood that we carved out and then painted. very cool. After a phatty nap, went to the metro to look for Augustine, but no luck. Went to a pub and ordered Stella Artois and sat down. The barkeep was a burly lumberjackish Frenchman who was very congenial and actually fit the place quite well. The radio played S&G's 'Mrs. Robinson' and the Beatles' 'Across the Universe'. Made me feel like I was a little closer to my own universe. Finally ran into Augustine and his buddy Andy and went back to the same pub to have a couple more night caps. Great to see Augustine. So much fun to hang out with again.
After waking up 20 mins after checkout we hit the tourist spots up: the Cathedral, Grand Place, Mannekin-Pis--which is this little 2 ft statue of a boy pissing. People flock around this fucker like its Da Vinci's Last Supper or something. Anyways we walk around aimlessly for a while and find this outdoor shopping mall, so we stroll down it and I turn around at one point for no particular reason and there was this ancient church sandwiched between a boutique and a gyro shop. I rushed in, Andy and Augustine were a little more hesitant, but they soon succumbed. What a SIGHT! An all white church! There were ornate art pieces and sculptures everywhere. The pews were just simple chairs and it truly felt like solace away from the storm. I sat there for a good ten minutes and became completely relaxed. I walked back into the world cleansed and refreshed and much cleaner than those at the gyro stand.
